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We are all many things. We all do many things. We will do many more things throughout our lives. Yet, when we are gone, most will primarily remember only one of them. They will pick from the lot and remember you as that. What they pick will, in their mind at least, be all that you are. Therefore, it is our job to ask ourselves with all the things we allow ourselves to do, with each and every one, “Is this something I want to be remembered for?”

This is why it is important to make “No” your default response to most things. Those things that seem like great ideas should get a “maybe” until they earn a solid answer one way or the other. But “yes” should only be given to those things that, if you were gone tomorrow, you wouldn’t mind being remembered for.

(P.S. I posted this before somewhere a long time ago but I couldn’t find it so I’m posting it here again so that I can find it if I’m ever looking for it again)

Some Postpartum Favorites – Baby Not Required – Jack Cheng

I didn’t learn it this way, and friends I’ve talked to say they didn’t either. When as schoolkids we were taught the three R’s of Reduce/Reuse/Recycle, we were not taught that they’re an order of operations. A flow chart. You first look to reduce, to not need the thing at all. Only when forgoing is out of the question do you look to borrow, barter, repurpose, or buy secondhand. And only once that’s exhausted do you pick up something new-but-recyclable.

New to me as well. What we believe in.

One of my favorite things is walking around my neighborhood. Especially with my wife. We live in such a lovely place with beautiful homes and wonderful neighbors. All the shops and restaurants are great too. Gratitude overload every time.

Episode 545: Importance | PM Talks S1:E9 – Mike Vardy

In this latest episode of our monthly series, PM Talks, Patrick Rhone and I further explore the delicate balance between urgency and – more notably this time around – importance in our lives. We explore how navigating these two forces impacts everything from birthday parties to home renovations and even our evolving relationship with AI.

I don’t promote these enough but I really enjoy these monthly talks with Mike. Give this one a listen.

Coming home | A Working Library

While one of the reasons oft declared for using POSSE is the ability to own your content, I’m less interested in ownership than I am in context. Writing on my own site has very different affordances: I’m not typing into a little box, but writing in a text file. I’m not surrounded by other people’s thinking, but located within my own body of work.

this whole thing is worth a read. Mandy is such a wonderful writer and thinker.

Clothes — A Daily Thread – Post 9

Do you ever think about them? The people? The ones who make your clothes?

When you see a country of origin on the label, do you ever stop to think about who they were and what their lives are like?

China, Bangladesh, India, Turkey, The Philippines, even the U.S.A.

Do you think about the person who picked the cotton… Or is that machines now? Wait, someone has to drive the machine, right? Did that same person plant the seed? Different machine? Then what? Did it go to a textile factory? How many people does it take? Are they happy?

Someone has to run the machines that make the thread and take the thread and make the fabric that is sewn together with thread that is made there or some other supply chain thread made by someone else who may not be happy and that then is sold to a brand that puts it on sale for a person like me but even that is a thread connecting back to the person who planted that seed and every other seed that came before it and… I think about them.

Did they get paid a fair wage? Enough to feed their kids? What is fair, there? Is that fair there or would it be fair anywhere? How are their kids doing? Are they hungry? Do they go to school? Will they grow up to do the same thing their father or mother does? Is that part of making shirts? Birthing a generation that will replace the shirt makers? Will those kids make shirts for my kids? Will those kids be hungry?

I ask these questions.

It makes me sad.

But, if I get my shirts that are made here in the United States, where is the cotton grown? What is the factory here like? Did they get a fair wage? Are their kids hungry? How much do I have to pay for a shirt to make sure no one is going hungry?

I think about this.

If I buy a t-shirt someone may be going hungry. If I don’t buy a t-shirt someone may be going hungry. Gah! I’ll buy the shirt!

$50? $100? Is that enough?

How much do I have to pay to make sure no one is beaten or abused or paid less that their labor is worth and that their kids are happy and full and going to school and getting a job where they can be paid a fair wage for a fair days work and that “fair” means to them what it means to me which is my kids won’t be hungry.

I don’t have answers. Only questions. Questions about a t-shirt that end up in exploitation and hunger because as a Black man in America I can’t ignore that this is the very reason I am a Black Man in America and not Africa because the thread that binds me to my ancestors can be stitched back to the desire for someone who wanted cheap clothing and a system that exploited humans to give it to them.

I think about this. You should too.